Шахматные анекдоты

Джордж Буш учится играть в шахматы. Он уже знает, как ходит пешка.
Теперь его будут учить, как ходит другая пешка.

***

Однажды Капабланку на одной пресс-конференции спросили, действительно ли он собирается жениться на дочери Форда-старшего.
Капабланка улыбнулся:
— Да, я действительно собирался стать зятем Форда-старшего, но миллиардер меня подвёл: он производил на свет только сыновей.

***

Таля однажды спросили:
— Как вы расцениваете шансы Майи Чибурданидзе стать чемпионом мира среди мужчин?
Таль ответил:
— Намного выше, чем мои — стать чемпионкой мира среди женщин.

***

— Для чего вы играете в шахматы? — спросил директор клуба одного заядлого шахматиста, который почти всегда проигрывал.
— Я мечтаю сыграть такую партию, чтобы увидеть свое имя напечатанным.
— Так закажите себе визитную карточку, и дело с концом!

***

К Рабиновичу пришли его приятели-шахматисты. Немного поиграли, и жена говорит:
— Предложи гостям что-нибудь освежающее!
— Конечно, — спохватился муж и распахнул окно.

***

Судят молодого парня за то что он ударил своего отца.
— Как же случилось, что вы подняли руку на отца?
— Понимаете, господин судья, мы с папой играли в шахматы, у нас был матч из 10 партий. И, когда счёт стал 7:0 в его пользу, я не выдержал и дал ему доской по голове. Жаль, не рассчитал удара.
— Да… Нужно вам учиться снимать стресс как-нибудь иначе – покурили бы, скажем…
— Нет, нет, что вы, я при родителях не курю…

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